Darn Camera

SO I think the time has finally come... my trusty camera is finally calling it quits! For some reason it wont charge or upload the pics and until I figure it out I am at a standstill with my blogging!

BE PATIENT!

I have my BEST man on it... BEEJ is trying a few different things out to try and revive it! I'll be in touch! HOPEFULLY SOON!

Ups and Downs

I feel like I write some version of this post about once a month! But I am always coming back to this feeling....
That life is always up and down I feel like I am just riding this never ending roller coaster! One minute the kids are playing super Hero's and Jedi's and the next one is balling because he got stabbed in the eye with a light saber and they start beating one each other until I break it up and Spencer breaks out with a " you are such a mean mommy , I don't like you!" SO I either send them to time out, yell until I feel better or on the rare occasion where I stop to THINK about it I try to change the situation and calm them down! (THIS ALWAYS works, I just never think of in the moment...ahhhh)

This constant roller coaster has been making me unusually sick lately
until at church (GREAT I KNOW) I kinda snapped! Getting ready for church was rocky but as SOON as we got in the doors to church the boys BOLTED and started running until they RAN right into the chappel where they continued to run around.... I WAS MORTIFIED!

I need to just throw in there that this is NOT the first time they have been told not to run in church! We have had multiple FHE lessons on reverence....its just not sticking!

I got them to come out in the hall where I REMINDED them we dont run at church and Spencer started arguing with me about WHY he HAD to run! And at that point I had had it! AND THEN they took off again! BJ FINALLY found us and I was about to cry I told him I had to leave! We went home and talked and talked about this rollercoaster!

It was then that I realized I needed some help! Its been a long time since I really SAT DOWN AND STUDIED my scriptures or had a truly meaningful PERSONAL prayer! I wasn't taking any of my "medicine for the MOTION SICKNESS." I was just riding the roller coaster and complaining without going to the ONE THING that could really help me feel better!

I sat on my bed and read and read! I said a meaningful prayer and really TALKED to my Father and Friend and told them I wouldn't forget where the real lasting medicine comes from!

I have been feeling better.... A LOT BETTER! I am STILL on the roller coaster! I have 3 kids under 5 I think it WILL be a series of ups and downs for a long time! BUT I have rediscovered (yet again) where real peace comes from!

I dont mean to sound all preachy or corny this part of my journey and it really helps me to write it down and hopefully get feedback from friends about what works for them!
If any of you out there have some ideas to help with this motion sickness please share!!!

Childrens Parade.. and a little something extra!!!

Every year in Cedar they have a Children's Parade! It was SO awesome! Here are the highlights... they had so many characters that this just a glimpse!

BJ had to work but I got to meet up with Am-Dawg and Dangsta!
Spencer and Cooper LOVED getting right up close to the characters! AJ was a little nervous at first but Spencer and Cooper were very good friends and encouraged AJ to come and see! And after a bit he warmed up and they all enjoyed it together! They had lots of creative floats and almost every childrens character you can think of
Cooper loved the Little Engine that Could and Elmo! My favorite was the Where the Wild Things Are!The BEST part of the parade was when the Star Wars group of came walking down the street! The kids hit the roof! We yelled and yelled for Darth to come over but he didn't hear us through his big helmet!

We also got a up close and personal visit from Spiderman!
The whole parade was a blast! I hope we can come and see it next year!

And then on Sunday Spencer gave another talk in Primary! This time the topic was "When My family thinks about Jesus we are a happy" hope you enjoy it.... he did a fantastic job!

Messy Messy Messy

Graham is really starting to be more independent! He wont let us feed him anymore he HAS to feed himself! It makes a HUGE mess but who cares right?
ahmmmThis stage only lasts so long and I remember HATING it with the other kids and this time I just want to roll with the spilled spaghetti, crunched up cheerios and love his messiness!
Enjoy it with meCause when those big eyes look up and smile at you all you can do is smile back!!


And yes a lot of these look similar but I just couldn't pick they were all so darling!

TWI-HARD

SO I have a confession... I am a TWI-HARD Twilight MOM! And I love every minute of it!

I LOVE making Twilight accessories declaring that I am TEAM EDWARD all the way!
I LOVE standing in line for hours on opening night with 200 other 15 year old girls! It makes me remember what it was like when I was young (AND HOW GLAD I AM TO HAVE GROWN UP...A LITTLE BIT ANYWAY)I LOVE spending time with my BESTEST FRIEND, laughing giggling and having some good old fashion girl time! I LOVE the excitement and tension between a girl, a vampire and a werewolf!
So I am anxiously awaiting Eclipse I love the relationship between 3 of them! And the next one is going to be the best! Let me know if you are a Twilight Mom too!!!

The Return of My Little Jedis

SO lately the kids are WAY into Star Wars! When I say WAY INTO it I MEAN WAY WAY WAY into it! Cooper says R2D2 like its his only reason for living! Spener can rehearse back the plot line of the whole collection! His favorite character is Anakin "before he started making bad choices and became Darth Vadar!!!"It makes me smile to hear his conclusions about the different characters!! We have watched all 6 movies and all the episodes of the Clone Wars cartoon! They love it!!We have started watching movies as a family! We make it a production which includes a soft cushy bed with everyones individual blankets, popcorn (or as Coopy calls it POP POP) and now that its getting colder, HOT CHOCOLATE! hmm yummy! Oh and don't forget the movie! ITS SO FUN to cuddle up all together!! SO tonight half hour before bed the kids asked to have movie time and I gave in as long as they let me take some pictures! FAIR trade right?And to add a Grahamy update in there... his new favorite thing is CLAPPING! He gets excited and he claps, he falls down and he claps, my favorite is when you come in after nap time to get him and he CLAPS and smiles as you walk in! Oh it warms my heart! So here is a little video of Mr. Sunshine clapping out his glee!

Fall Festivities

So here is the big long catch up! Feel free to just browse the pics its a LONG BEAST to read!!!October kicked off with the most important day of the year...

My 27th Bday! One year older and wiser too...Happy Birthday to.......ME
Am-DAWG and I went to St George for our last BIG yard saleing trip of the season and then went to RED ROBIN (sing the song with me) with Jenise!



Then Bj's fam came over for cake (root beer cake yummy yummy) and presents!And as you all know I get SO excited about presents! Here I am in a moment of bliss....
Later in October Amber Jenise and I went to Krumpets (a great decorating store) for a Witches night out costume contest! I made all the capes and we got all decked out hoping to win the 50 dollar gift certificate! I think we looked spectacularly spooky! Unfortunately out of the 3 Hocus Pocus sisters only Jenise own! But we are so proud of her for representing!
Mom and Abby came to visit for Jenises Bday and Halloween
We got J up on the saddle at Texas Road House for the Big 2-5!

Gramzie and J teasing Spenc at the restaurant and Spencer hating EVERY minute of it! :)

A rare picture of me and the hottie who calls me his wife! What.A.STUD!

We had or first snow at the end of October! And it was good thing because Spencer had been begging and praying for snow since August!They got all bundled up and just soaked it in!

Until... Coop got a little too much to soak in.... luckily Spencer was there to give a "feel better hug" so they could get back to enjoying the snow!


Halloween arrived along with lots of family to dress up with! Sommer and Chris came down from Rexburg. Chris was Max from "Where the wild things are" and Sommer joined the witch sisters! Mom and Abby came from Mexico and we all went trick or treating in St George!

The stars of the night we my 3 scary Halloween boys! Spencer was a Skeleton (made my MOI) Cooper was a bat and Grahamy was a black widow spider(made my me too!) Oh and we cant forget my knight in green armor.... BJ was Frankenstein!November kicked off with our last craft fair! We all drove up to Gunnison Utah, a small town where Allison grew up! IT WAS A BLAST! We all had a great time just us girls! To top off a great time we all made more then we ever had! SO YEA!!!!
We had a small booth so we had to crawl under the table to get in and out! It made for a lot of laughing!!!
We celebrated a big birthday in November, Kristys 50th! She didn't want a big to-do so we all surprised her and took her to her favorite place.... IN AND OUT!
And our most recent event was Thanksgiving! We had it early again this year but it was great! It was over and Mindy's house and she did a beautiful job of decorating!I was on the kids table decor! I made a place-mat to color and a cute crayon envelope and napkin ring! The kids had a great time coloring! I cant forget the SWEET turkey hats the boys made for the big day! They looked so FESTIVE, is that the word?There were lots and lots of people who joined us!
BJ, Cadie, Lance, Kristy, Brent, Bristie, Matt and MOI
Matts Brothers Girlfriend, Matts Brother, Matts Mom, Matts Dad, Aunt Liz and Uncle Jess! Whew I am so sorry I don't remember Matt's families names!!
We all brought different things for dinner, and Brock made a fried turkey!
It was a great holiday!
SO wow that was A LOT! I am committing that I am NOT going to fall THAT behind again! And I am going to get some pictures up of all the crafts I have been working on! It has been SO much fun to try and do a homemade Christmas! All the craft blogs have been so helpful! I am addicted to stalking them and finding all the GREAT EASY ideas!

LOST......

Well its been forever since I posted! I have a few excuses so sit down cause here we go...

1. I lost my camera and whats a post without pictures

2. Life has been a little all over the place and I didn't want to post all about how crummy I was feeling!

3. I have been working on my homemade Christmas projects EVERY spare moment!

But I have picked myself up found my camera and decided to take a few minutes to get back on MY journal! SO get ready cause I am going to dump a whole lot of pictures from the last 2 months!

Just for as a little teaser here are my 3 little boys all clean a happy

Graham just started having a bath with the big boys and he LOVES it! Soak in the smiles cause it takes a small miracle and a tub full of toys to get them all blissfully happy at once!!!

Spencer's First Talk

Spencer had his first talk on Sunday! It was on the Family Proclamation, and he nailed it! We made him a picture talk and then practiced all week. I was a little worried he would get too nervous once he got up there... but he wasn't nervous and remembered everything! I AM SO PROUD of my big boy! I cant believe he is so big already! I cant wait for his next 1st!

I have so much to update from last week...I am working on!!

My Cleaning Dilemma

Keeping my house clean and finding the balance between NAZI clean and filthy dirty is so hard for me! I feel like I am either running around after the kids to pick up each toy and getting grouchy about it or in a defiant "I'm not cleaning cause it never stays clean anyway" kind of bad attitude!

It seems like it stems from the idea that if my house is clean I am a good mom and wife and doing my job and if its dirty then I am a terrible mom and need to be embarrassed

WHY

do we lie to ourselves and PUSH AND PUSH to keep up this image that houses are never used or played in and are ALWAYS picked up?

I AM TIRED OF BEING STRESSED AND EMBARRASSED

MY WORTH IS NOT DETERMINED BY HOW MESSY OR CLEAN MY HOUSE IS!

I am not going to give up and never clean but I am DONE feeling like it has to be picked up and 100% show room ready for visitors and family!

WE LIVE HERE, toys get played with food gets eaten, pillows get swung around, laundry gets cleaned (or not cleaned:), beds get slept in!

I AM STILL A GOOD MOM IF MY HOUSE ISN'T SPOTLESS!!!

I refuse to play into this perfect woman perfect house image! SO I PROMISE to NEVER come into your house and think, hmm she hasn't cleaned today! or hmm at least I vacuum before people come over! I PROMISE to come into your house and look at YOU and spend my energy being a friend and not comparing who vacuumed most recently or who wipes their counters most often!

WILL YOU DO THE SAME FOR ME?

Silly Songs and Wrestlers!

Spencer has been learning some great new songs at Preschool so I thought I would share them! It is so exciting to watch him start growing up and learning all on his own!

(Just in case it hard to understand him.... the 1st song is about herman the worman and he eats a banana and the 2nd song is about monkeys teasing a dinosaur who sneaks up on them and chomps them out of their tree!!!)

Amber and I are getting ready for our next craft fair so we got together and were getting a few things ready! The kids started having a wrestling match! Spencer would pick the next wrestler charge them a blanket and then they would go for it in the wrestling ring! IT WAS SO FUNNY!

I am watching out for some opportunities to catch Coop and Graham "LIVE" as well so stay tuned!

Spencer's First Primary Program

Spencer had his first Primary Program last Sunday! When we got his part we were both so excited! We would practice all the time! He would set up chairs and give each of us a spot and them have us take turns holding the "microphone" and saying our own part! He was just so excited!

Well when the day arrived and we walked into the chapel he decided he DID NOT want to sit up in the front! It took LOTS AND LOTS of pleading and about 20 minutes to convince him it would be fun and to be excited not nervous!

Once he got up there he did GREAT! He stood and sat when he was supposed to and said his part really well! My husband did NOT want me to video him but... I snuck this little video of his part! The Sunbeams each said something our parents do to help our family and Spencer's part was

"Our Moms Clean Up"

So drum roll please....

And there it is! Next year I will be more sneaky and take a few more videos!

My Moment of Clarity

The past few weeks have been rough on me! I have just felt a little down and out, and I dont know why!!? I have been so grumpy and edgy! I feel myself go from 1 to angry over small things and I wonder why? I have been feeling constantly overwhelmed and upset and it makes me sad!

I snap at the boys and scare myself! I can see how I react in their faces and then I just want to be different! I know I DONT want the be that kind of Mom! I want to respond quietly and sweetly I want to brush of the everyday messes and just be able to relax and play with them... but for some reason lately I cant!!! And my heart slows down and I just ache because I DONT WANT TO BE THIS GIRL!

Today was another bad day, the kids made too many messes and fought too much and at nap time they just screamed and beat on each other! The first time I went in I threatened them with no more juice and raised my voice!

As I sat down I remembered a blog Amber recommended I read for a little pick me up and this sweet girl I dont even know softened my heart and helped me hear what the spirit was trying to tell me!

At that moment the boys started crying and I could tell someone hurt someone else! I went in softly and asked Spencer to come sit next to me and Cooper (who was the victim THIS time) I told him I wanted to be a better mommy and told him I needed Heavenly Fathers help! So we said a prayer together!

Cooper wiggled and I cried and asked Heavenly Father to help me answer with tenderness instead of harshness to laugh and play instead of correct and scold! I asked for extra strength to think before I respond so we could be a happier family!

When I closed the prayer and opened my wet eyes I saw my two beautiful boys and felt such clarity and peace! I knew that if I just took some time to ask for the extra help I needed I COULD be more of the kind of MOM I want to be and my BEAUTIFUL boys DESERVE! I dont have to wonder how, I KNOW that I can get all the extra strength I need if I only turn to my Brother and ASK!

So in the moments of frustration that are SURE to come (before I even finish this post, I'm sure!!) I am going to try and just ask for help as I approach a intense situation! And hopefully my kinder attitude will rub off on them!! AND if not well I'll know where to turn....

So thank you to Amber and this sweet girl who opened her heart and testimony; you were the instruments in His hands to show me that He knows me and is ready to help me!!

The BEST and WORST

Lately it seems our life is one of the two extremes, GREAT or TERRIBLE! Here is a little glimpse

Last week the kids and I decided to run to Walmart...and it turned into THE most eventful and awful trip I have ever had at the store!

Spencer and Cooper were fighting (that wasn't a shock) so I took Spencer out of the cart and he held onto the side of the cart! For some reason (I wish I knew) Cooper PUSHED Spencer off the cart and his toes were run over by the cart! So he started screaming and Cooper started crying! I soothed Spencer and put him back in the cart he went on to smack Cooper so hard in the face that his nose started bleeding! All the while these little old Polygamist moms were STARING me down! Spencer was screaming his toe was broken Cooper was balling and bleeding! It was beyond a ruff shopping trip it was a full out disaster!!!!!!!!!!!

SO I LEFT

Got the kids in the car, I pick up Graham and he had peeded out! ALL OVER ME! Now all 3 kids are crying and I feel like running into a hole and dying!! After we got home and calmed down we ate some watermelon and stayed inside so we didn't have any more public bloody battles!! At the end of that terrible day when we went to bed I prayed that we could ALL have a better day tomorrow!

Well that weekend my prayer was answered; we went to St George and on Saturday I had a WONDERFUL day! I was able to go yard saleing (my favorite thing!!!) BJ went hiking with his friend and then that evening we all got together and played on the trampoline! There weren't any rules or fighting or hurt feelings just fun... TOGETHER! It was just what we all needed!

The boys had SO much fun with BJ!

Graham didn't love it as much as we did! He was really startled!

Spencer LOVED jumping the higher and harder the better!! I know I looks like a dork but I was lovin it! I forgot how fun it was, it made me feel like a kid again!

Cooper DIDN'T want to jump with out someone there to hold his hand! So when he got nervous he would sit on the side and wait till we calmed down!

We snapped a family picture, it was the best night!